Feeling Guilted -- Should I be?

SkyWarrior

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CritterZone said:
I would sure be careful about who I rehome this horse to. It doesn't sound to me like she is going to be safe for the majority of the horse-owning population. Sometimes the demons in rescued animals are just too much for them to ever get over. Have you considered euthanasia?
She would be fine for an arena-only home, as a broodmare, or with a very experienced rider who would take her as a challenge. Rescue believes this horse can be cured, so they can have her back.
 

boothcreek

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Don't feel guilty, rescue organization have the guilt-trip in their job description. Like people, some horses will never be safe in some situations, and there are also the totally psychotic ones.
We had a mare for 11 yrs(born and raised here like many others), completely neurotic animal and once she got hysterical she got so blinded by fear and who knows what, she was absolutely dangerous and if you tried to "direct" her hysterical reaction away from you(like step behind the fence so she doesn't run you over) she would actually attack you! Sometimes she would snap without any provocation too. Not trust worthy in any way shape or form, never seen behaviour like hers and haven't since.
This mare hospitalized me twice before we ended up getting rid of her.

Luckily no injuries as severe as yours, altho they were hospital stays all the same.

I hope you fully recover from your injuries!!! And I also hope you find a nice quiet trail horse, there are so many good quiet horses out there you shouldn't have to deal with an untrustworthy one.
 

CritterZone

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SkyWarrior said:
CritterZone said:
I would sure be careful about who I rehome this horse to. It doesn't sound to me like she is going to be safe for the majority of the horse-owning population. Sometimes the demons in rescued animals are just too much for them to ever get over. Have you considered euthanasia?
She would be fine for an arena-only home, as a broodmare, or with a very experienced rider who would take her as a challenge. Rescue believes this horse can be cured, so they can have her back.
I only suggest it because you never know who will end up with the horse. Yes, the rescue will take her back, then they adopt her out to someone who only wants to ride in an arena. A year from now that person sells her to an unsuspecting soul who tries to trail ride... Or, as often happens with troubled horses, the behavior escalates and she becomes no longer safe to ride in an arena. Then just no longer safe to handle.

As for letting her be a broodmare, I don't think any animal should be allowed to reproduce if they are not as near perfect as possible, and that includes temperament. It may well be this mare had a horrible time early on and it made her a bit wonky. It may also be that she was a bit wonky to begin with and that is how she ended up in a rescue situation. There is a huge problem with the vast number of unwanted horses out there right now, and lots of really nice horses are heading to the slaughter houses. I would hesitate to breed anything that may produce a less than desirable temperament, because there is already plenty of that out there.

I would be very worried about where she could end up, admittedly though, I tend to worry about a lot of stuff - maybe some of it is unfounded. On the other hand, I wonder if the rescue knew of her issues with being a trail horse, and did they know that was your intended purpose?
 

SkyWarrior

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CritterZone said:
SkyWarrior said:
CritterZone said:
I would sure be careful about who I rehome this horse to. It doesn't sound to me like she is going to be safe for the majority of the horse-owning population. Sometimes the demons in rescued animals are just too much for them to ever get over. Have you considered euthanasia?
She would be fine for an arena-only home, as a broodmare, or with a very experienced rider who would take her as a challenge. Rescue believes this horse can be cured, so they can have her back.
I only suggest it because you never know who will end up with the horse. Yes, the rescue will take her back, then they adopt her out to someone who only wants to ride in an arena. A year from now that person sells her to an unsuspecting soul who tries to trail ride... Or, as often happens with troubled horses, the behavior escalates and she becomes no longer safe to ride in an arena. Then just no longer safe to handle.

As for letting her be a broodmare, I don't think any animal should be allowed to reproduce if they are not as near perfect as possible, and that includes temperament. It may well be this mare had a horrible time early on and it made her a bit wonky. It may also be that she was a bit wonky to begin with and that is how she ended up in a rescue situation. There is a huge problem with the vast number of unwanted horses out there right now, and lots of really nice horses are heading to the slaughter houses. I would hesitate to breed anything that may produce a less than desirable temperament, because there is already plenty of that out there.

I would be very worried about where she could end up, admittedly though, I tend to worry about a lot of stuff - maybe some of it is unfounded. On the other hand, I wonder if the rescue knew of her issues with being a trail horse, and did they know that was your intended purpose?
Yes, they knew that was my intended purpose. There are some interesting developments that I may share once everything shakes out.
 

bonbean01

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Glad you are feeling better Sky :hugs It could have been so much worse!!!

No guilt for you...you worked with this horse for a long time and gave it many chances...so...no guilt...feel happy that you tried and feel blessed that your injuries were not worse than they were...which is still pretty bad!!!

You did good by this horse...sometimes we have to know when it is time to let go :hugs
 

Chevoner

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I concur with those who've posted above me; there is no guilt on your part, especially after two years of work with this animal.
I don't mean to sound callous; as an animal lover myself, I get it... but there is a difference between a person and an animal.
One always must come before the other.
 

violetsky888

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I think the "Rescue" is try to protect themselves against a lawsuit, by blaming the victim. Any horse can spook and be highly reactive, there could of been an unseen danger, but a horse
that puts itself in danger by such an extreme reaction is not normal. If a horse is not improving almost immediately with training then there is a problem with the trainer or the horse.
The backing and dancing around and bolting after two years of riding
make me question the horse's sanity. I have a friend that has been training quarter horses for years. She sold one sweet "deadbroke" gelding to a family that came back to her a year later crazy.
They had actually cut his mouth up with some kind of crazy bit. She tried to rehabilitate the horse but he was just too far gone. Sometime good-hearted people get taken
in and try to save a horse that is not likely to ever be a safe riding horse. If you are making progress, even small steps almost daily then you are a good fit. If you want to get a rescue horse
in the future try working him in a round pen before taking him. I'd test him out by seeing his reaction over something he doesn't like, perhaps fly spray. A horse that dances around a little
might be considered normal, one that crashes into fences or lashes out might have the same reaction under saddle. If they are used to fly spray try spooking them opening an umbrella.
Good luck with your recovery and run away from that rescue. They should be more conscientious about placing their animals.
 

Catahoula

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So sorry to hear SkyWarrior about your accident but am glad you are ALIVE!! Praying for your speedy recovery :hugs
The people at the rescue should be the ones feeling guilty for sending such a horse to you to begin with. They are supposed to match the horse to your need...a trail horse. Do NOT feel guilty. You did nothing wrong.
 

SkyWarrior

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violetsky888 said:
I think the "Rescue" is try to protect themselves against a lawsuit, by blaming the victim. Any horse can spook and be highly reactive, there could of been an unseen danger, but a horse
that puts itself in danger by such an extreme reaction is not normal. If a horse is not improving almost immediately with training then there is a problem with the trainer or the horse.
The backing and dancing around and bolting after two years of riding
make me question the horse's sanity. I have a friend that has been training quarter horses for years. She sold one sweet "deadbroke" gelding to a family that came back to her a year later crazy.
They had actually cut his mouth up with some kind of crazy bit. She tried to rehabilitate the horse but he was just too far gone. Sometime good-hearted people get taken
in and try to save a horse that is not likely to ever be a safe riding horse. If you are making progress, even small steps almost daily then you are a good fit. If you want to get a rescue horse
in the future try working him in a round pen before taking him. I'd test him out by seeing his reaction over something he doesn't like, perhaps fly spray. A horse that dances around a little
might be considered normal, one that crashes into fences or lashes out might have the same reaction under saddle. If they are used to fly spray try spooking them opening an umbrella.
Good luck with your recovery and run away from that rescue. They should be more conscientious about placing their animals.
I worry a lot if it was something I did, but I don't think so. I used a snaffle bit and even switched to an eggbutt snaffle with a roller because this horse went through bubble gum chewing type of behavior. It was a mild bit. I tried a more serious bit and she had a lot of problems with it, so I went to something she was good with.

I never gave in to her temper tantrums and always waited and asked for her to do something. I found out by accident that she was nervous when I kept a loose rein, so I kept a light contact on the bit so she had some reassurance.

Last year after I got enough time on her, we even went into the backcountry with her. She did fine. :hu This year she's been challenging me all the time. It's not like I'm taking her far -- the place I ended up getting tossed was about two miles from home. I keep wondering what kind of thing I did to cause her to blaze down a mountain.

The rescue is now wanting to talk to my vet about how I care for her. Geez. They told me to sell her when I called them and then wouldn't have anything to do with me until I pressed the issue. Yeah, the thousands of dollars in hay, feed, medicine, shoes, and care show what a bad owner I am. My vet told us that she was the right weight when he came to look at her legs the time before I ended up in the hospital...
 

SkyWarrior

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I'm enclosing pictures I took of her the other day. I think her weight is fine, if a bit out of condition. Sorry about the sideways photos. There's something wonky with Windows 8 and this server. :rolleyes: I've rotated them and they look fine on my computer but not on the list. :idunno

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