Farmer Kitty
True BYH Addict
The Purina Diet--JOKE
Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for my
dogs: Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus. I was about to check out when a
woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think that I had an
elephant?
Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I did not
have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I
probably should not because I ended up in the hospital last time. On the
bright side though, I had lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive
care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my body and IVs in both
arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat
one
or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now)..
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the parking
lot to lick my butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was
going
to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard! WAL-MART won't let me
shop
there anymore.
Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for my
dogs: Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus. I was about to check out when a
woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think that I had an
elephant?
Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I did not
have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I
probably should not because I ended up in the hospital last time. On the
bright side though, I had lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive
care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my body and IVs in both
arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat
one
or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now)..
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the parking
lot to lick my butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was
going
to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard! WAL-MART won't let me
shop
there anymore.
