Baymule
Herd Master
We're here any time for you! No matter how much we love someone, they can make us crazy sometimes. And just think what we do to them! LOL!!
horse & husband related frustrations....
- Thread starter promiseacres
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- #32
promiseacres
Herd Master
Thanks @Bunnylady I appreciate it. 
So DH worked late Tuesday, got up early Wednesday to fix a problem with the trailer he noticed when I hooked it up.... his only request was for me to make him breakfast. Which I did.
Horses did ok. Still loving my Richie. Talked to a friend from church. In the past they asked if we wanted to use the large very well broke POA they have for their grandkids who only come very occasionally... Soooo need to talk to DH, my Mom and figure a plan for Duke.... but really think it would work better. Duke is improving but will need maintained. With DH not helping with that I would feel a lot better to have 2 horses that kids can learn on.
So DH worked late Tuesday, got up early Wednesday to fix a problem with the trailer he noticed when I hooked it up.... his only request was for me to make him breakfast. Which I did.
Horses did ok. Still loving my Richie. Talked to a friend from church. In the past they asked if we wanted to use the large very well broke POA they have for their grandkids who only come very occasionally... Soooo need to talk to DH, my Mom and figure a plan for Duke.... but really think it would work better. Duke is improving but will need maintained. With DH not helping with that I would feel a lot better to have 2 horses that kids can learn on.
frustratedearthmother
Herd Master
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Yay - hope that it works out!
Baymule
Herd Master
Sounds like you are on the right track. Duke may be a nice horse, but he sounds too high strung for kids. We recently bought a kid gentle horse rescued from a kill pen.
- Thread starter
- #35
promiseacres
Herd Master
And DH is upset..
.says I change my mind too much. Says I am laying it on him... when does he have time to ride?? (Very true and but good reason to not keep the horse...) idk maybe I can talk him into finding someone to lease Duke for the summer..... he just wants to borrow the POA for trail riding.... (I think he needs to be here so John can learn on him) and since our pastures are newly planted I do not have hay enough right now for 3. I also do not want Duke to sit idle (like hang at my Mom's ).... guess I shouldn't of gotten Ritchie. Duke did behave better last fall without company. But I do think issues would come around the more we ask of him. 
Mom is ok with finding Duke a home. As she says, she doesn't want to ride him....
NH homesteader
Herd Master
Well personally, if I had the opportunity to borrow a horse when I wanted to go trail riding and not have to take care of it every day (and pay to feed it, etc), I would be all over that! Doesn't sound like the second horse would be ridden all that often, so why have a second horse? That's just me. I would keep Richie and the minis and borrow a horse on the occasions you go with DH. When your kids get older maybe look for a second kid-friendly horse, which it doesn't sound like Duke is going to be anytime soon.
- Thread starter
- #37
promiseacres
Herd Master
my plan is keep working Richie... he needs some desensitization. But I while work him, the kids could be riding the POA.... I really want John to ride, not just sit on a horse. He needs time in the saddle at home before I am going to through him on the trails. On any horse, kid broke or not. He has mostly riden in a buddyseat or leadline. Maybe 2 rides by his self.
NH homesteader
Herd Master
There ya go, if the other horse will be ridden then go for it. A kid safe horse is a wonderful thing!
AClark
Loving the herd life
Is that what DH wants though? To learn to ride, or to just be included when you go trail riding - where a push button horse that he can just sit on would be ideal?
My husband wants to learn to ride, it doesn't take much convincing to get him out on the weekend, and he works 12 hour days during the week monday - friday. I could probably convince him to go after work (if he got home from work and his horse was saddled and ready, no convincing needed) if we didn't have 5 kids that can't babysit themselves, lol.
However, if he just wanted to be included in going out riding, I'd be ok with that too and we already have a horse that is so dead broke that you can literally just sit on him and point him where you want to go. He is a no tune up necessary horse really, hadn't been ridden in a year when we got him and I hopped on and no trouble, other than he's kinda lazy.
The only reason we haven't done a trail ride together yet is MY horse is a bit of a flake and she isn't ready for open country. I mean I could definitely give it a shot, but I'm the one that is probably going to get wasted, not DH on his lazy little gelding, lol.
That's a conversation y'all need to have, is not what you want, but what he wants out of riding. If he just wants to go, then by all means the dead broke horse that never needs a tune up is a great purchase/borrow. If he wants to learn, I'd lean more into buying. But, that only works if you're both on the same page.
The other thing is not having time. Now that the days are long, what prevents him from going after work unless he's just tired? Tired is tired, but if that's not it, work together to make a solution of being able to ride after work, even if it's just half an hour in the round pen or out in the pasture - better than nothing.
My husband wants to learn to ride, it doesn't take much convincing to get him out on the weekend, and he works 12 hour days during the week monday - friday. I could probably convince him to go after work (if he got home from work and his horse was saddled and ready, no convincing needed) if we didn't have 5 kids that can't babysit themselves, lol.
However, if he just wanted to be included in going out riding, I'd be ok with that too and we already have a horse that is so dead broke that you can literally just sit on him and point him where you want to go. He is a no tune up necessary horse really, hadn't been ridden in a year when we got him and I hopped on and no trouble, other than he's kinda lazy.
The only reason we haven't done a trail ride together yet is MY horse is a bit of a flake and she isn't ready for open country. I mean I could definitely give it a shot, but I'm the one that is probably going to get wasted, not DH on his lazy little gelding, lol.
That's a conversation y'all need to have, is not what you want, but what he wants out of riding. If he just wants to go, then by all means the dead broke horse that never needs a tune up is a great purchase/borrow. If he wants to learn, I'd lean more into buying. But, that only works if you're both on the same page.
The other thing is not having time. Now that the days are long, what prevents him from going after work unless he's just tired? Tired is tired, but if that's not it, work together to make a solution of being able to ride after work, even if it's just half an hour in the round pen or out in the pasture - better than nothing.
- Thread starter
- #40
promiseacres
Herd Master
Sorry to confuse... DH is Josh, DS is John, who is 8. A good age to learn in my opinion.
DH knows basic riding skills and is what i consider an advanced beginner/intermediate rider.
DH thinks I can ride Duke, (I can but no longer sure I want the fight....) while he gets my Richie and John gets the POA, Cookie but that's only when we are on trails. DH hasn't wanted to nor shown inclination to ride since we brought home Duke last summer. Usually he is too sore or too tired. He has some health issues which zaps his energy.... when I do suggest we do something with the horses he brings up the never ending To do list.... while I get he is upset I am changing my mind about Duke.... I just feel as if I know my limits.... and in some aspect since I do the caretaking, maintenance I should have some pull on what horses we have. My anxiety is better but I really don't want to test myself if Duke continue his brattyness.... he is upset I am having someone tune him up, but he is upset if I find another solution.... 
he is super busy at work right now.... he is a ag equipment technician.... and it's planting season. I may have a lead on someone local to take him for the summer 
..... that may appease DH and keep Duke worked for now. Though keeping him close just in case we would want to use him....
DH knows basic riding skills and is what i consider an advanced beginner/intermediate rider.
DH thinks I can ride Duke, (I can but no longer sure I want the fight....) while he gets my Richie and John gets the POA, Cookie but that's only when we are on trails. DH hasn't wanted to nor shown inclination to ride since we brought home Duke last summer. Usually he is too sore or too tired. He has some health issues which zaps his energy.... when I do suggest we do something with the horses he brings up the never ending To do list....
while I get he is upset I am changing my mind about Duke.... I just feel as if I know my limits.... and in some aspect since I do the caretaking, maintenance I should have some pull on what horses we have. My anxiety is better but I really don't want to test myself if Duke continue his brattyness.... he is upset I am having someone tune him up, but he is upset if I find another solution.... he is super busy at work right now.... he is a ag equipment technician.... and it's planting season. I may have a lead on someone local to take him for the summer ..... that may appease DH and keep Duke worked for now. Though keeping him close just in case we would want to use him....
