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ragdollcatlady
Herd Master
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HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE HAVING A BAD DAY:
1. Did you wake up to your (rude) digital scale, pointing to a number, 2 lbs higher than you were yesterday?
YES= Solution: tell Rudy to shut up and hop on the nice analog scale, Francois, since he always says you weigh 2-4 lbs less than Rudy does. While you were absolutely expecting this, since you did in fact eat 6 pieces of indian pizza for lunch yesterday.... it still points to a disappointing start of the day. And yes you will eat 6 pieces next time too since it will probably be 6 months to a year until the next time. Life is short, eat the pizza!
2. Did you literally jump at work, startled by the loud noise from the other side of the treatment room, only to realize that it was actually 'chemical warfare' deployed by the "most gassiest coworker on the planet?"
YES= Solution: I don't have one, just keep your head down do your work and pray that the smell wafts down the hall instead of across the room.
3. When you pulled into your driveway to grab a quick lunch and feed the 2 little bottle babies, did you hear a distressed baby goat crying loudly in that way that makes your chest hurt and causes you to fly faster than lightening, to find him?
YES= Solution: Grab the bloody baby goat ( I am talking about 'horror movies that I cant watch cause there is too much blood' kind of blood) shuffle/run him into the house, trying not to trip on the bottle babies, while hustling as fast as humanly possible, dripping blood every where.... I MEAN EVERYWHERE! … into the kitchen. 
Set bloody kid down and go back to grab the bottle kid that got lost trying to follow you (probably cause you moved too fast). Grab a paper towel and apply pressure to the spurting blood vessel while hollering very loudly for your kid that is still asleep, 2 rooms away, to come help you cause you have an EEEEMERGENCY! Stop the bleeding, apply a bandage, make sure it is not constricting his breathing, or eyes, but will still apply pressure to the errant blood vessel. Apparently the area surrounding last weeks disbudding was disturbed, scratched or something and the blood vessel took advantage.This kid had actually had a very lowkey disbudding. Go figure. 
4. Did you have to eat a very disappointing lunch of just tuna, because after feeding the bottle babies and putting all 4 kids in the crate in the living room to take their afternoon naps, you realize you don't have time to eat anything good, but still have to head back to work in 10 minutes?
YES= Solution: I just decided last week that tuna for lunch was not satisfying. No fix for running out of time today, emergencies happen when they want to... just eat the dang tuna and be glad you had time for that.
5. Did you get a call from you kid after being at work for only about half an hour, that the injured baby goat is now in distress and seems to be having difficulty breathing?
YES= Solution: ask kid if he can cut the bottom strap on the bandage. No he cant. Hustle home faster than a Hasa-Dee-Da (grandpa's term for hurry it up), cut the strap and add a different one that doesn't make the kid panic. He was panicking and making a snug strap a tight one.
6. When you were at the gym, did you get blinded by the sunlight, flashing and sparkling off the hairs on your legs because you haven't shaved or waxed in a month????
YES= Solution: Close your eyes and pretend that no one else notices or cares. Not like it matters cause you aren't trying to impress them anyways. (Not a joke, this really happened!!!)
7. Did you just get a picture of the most handsomest guy you know.... only to see that his beard has gone missing? As in.... it is not anywhere near his face, his chin is NAKED!?!?
YES= Solution: Immediately put up flyers and notices looking for the missing beard. Light browninsh/ginger, with some white, possibly frostbite, last seen in Alaska, on Alaskas face (also known as McSteamy). No collar or tags, not microchipped, but I miss it dearly, very well loved! If found please return it to me, Kitty, at Little patch of Weeds Farm. If you are not in a position to catch it, but have seen it please forward the information so I can come try to locate it myself. Thanks.
8. Did you have to jab your favorite goat with another injection that stings, and then milk her out to keep her udder from becoming over full, only to make her upset, and yourself upset and, and, and, and now you are more upset about upsetting her than she is right now?
YES= Solution: Let it go, she is over it already. She is well fed and asleep.
9. Did you disbud the 2 little baby goats and get really distressed because the littlest one, your favorite, seemed to take it harder than usual so now you are sad?
YES= Solution: Let it go, his tummy is full, and he is asleep. Just pray he doesn't get the whole bleeding vessel thing the other kids had going on. Pray and pray some more.
10. Did you decide that after such a hard day, you were going to treat yourself to tacos, only to end up burning your mouth because you tried to hold the fork in your lips for just a second, so you didn't have to set it down.... the same fork you just flipped the taco shell over in the HOT OIL!?!?!?
YES= Solution: Scream, make up some new bad words no one has ever heard of and suck on frozen strawberries for half an hour trying to slow the burn, while you finish cooking.
11. Did you decide to make a nice drink to make up for all of the above, only to have the foil refuse to peel off the champagne bottle????
YES= Solution: Use every last ounce of the patience you have left, realizing that today is only about 2 hours from being over and peel ity bity baby pieces off the top until you finally get it off and get your drink.
If any or all of the above questions were answered in the affirmative, you have definitely had a bad day! No if's, ands or buts about it. Tomorrow is another day... actually it starts in about half an hour... hopefully it will be better than today was, but I think, based on todays experiences, we should just skip Rudy in the morning and have our weigh in with Francois... after all, he is always a gentleman and he is too polite to mention the tacos or the Bellinis we used to make up for the rest of this no good, very bad, day.
Welcome to my life...… come inside if you dare..... (scary laughing sounds here....)
1. Did you wake up to your (rude) digital scale, pointing to a number, 2 lbs higher than you were yesterday?
YES= Solution: tell Rudy to shut up and hop on the nice analog scale, Francois, since he always says you weigh 2-4 lbs less than Rudy does. While you were absolutely expecting this, since you did in fact eat 6 pieces of indian pizza for lunch yesterday.... it still points to a disappointing start of the day. And yes you will eat 6 pieces next time too since it will probably be 6 months to a year until the next time. Life is short, eat the pizza!
2. Did you literally jump at work, startled by the loud noise from the other side of the treatment room, only to realize that it was actually 'chemical warfare' deployed by the "most gassiest coworker on the planet?"
YES= Solution: I don't have one, just keep your head down do your work and pray that the smell wafts down the hall instead of across the room.
3. When you pulled into your driveway to grab a quick lunch and feed the 2 little bottle babies, did you hear a distressed baby goat crying loudly in that way that makes your chest hurt and causes you to fly faster than lightening, to find him?
YES= Solution: Grab the bloody baby goat ( I am talking about 'horror movies that I cant watch cause there is too much blood' kind of blood
) shuffle/run him into the house, trying not to trip on the bottle babies, while hustling as fast as humanly possible, dripping blood every where.... I MEAN EVERYWHERE! … into the kitchen. Set bloody kid down and go back to grab the bottle kid that got lost trying to follow you (probably cause you moved too fast). Grab a paper towel and apply pressure to the spurting blood vessel while hollering very loudly for your kid that is still asleep, 2 rooms away, to come help you cause you have an EEEEMERGENCY! Stop the bleeding, apply a bandage, make sure it is not constricting his breathing, or eyes, but will still apply pressure to the errant blood vessel. Apparently the area surrounding last weeks disbudding was disturbed, scratched or something and the blood vessel took advantage.This kid had actually had a very lowkey disbudding. Go figure. 4. Did you have to eat a very disappointing lunch of just tuna, because after feeding the bottle babies and putting all 4 kids in the crate in the living room to take their afternoon naps, you realize you don't have time to eat anything good, but still have to head back to work in 10 minutes?
YES= Solution: I just decided last week that tuna for lunch was not satisfying. No fix for running out of time today, emergencies happen when they want to... just eat the dang tuna and be glad you had time for that.
5. Did you get a call from you kid after being at work for only about half an hour, that the injured baby goat is now in distress and seems to be having difficulty breathing?
YES= Solution: ask kid if he can cut the bottom strap on the bandage. No he cant. Hustle home faster than a Hasa-Dee-Da (grandpa's term for hurry it up), cut the strap and add a different one that doesn't make the kid panic. He was panicking and making a snug strap a tight one.
6. When you were at the gym, did you get blinded by the sunlight, flashing and sparkling off the hairs on your legs because you haven't shaved or waxed in a month????
YES= Solution: Close your eyes and pretend that no one else notices or cares. Not like it matters cause you aren't trying to impress them anyways. (Not a joke, this really happened!!!)
7. Did you just get a picture of the most handsomest guy you know.... only to see that his beard has gone missing? As in.... it is not anywhere near his face, his chin is NAKED!?!?
YES= Solution: Immediately put up flyers and notices looking for the missing beard. Light browninsh/ginger, with some white, possibly frostbite, last seen in Alaska, on Alaskas face (also known as McSteamy). No collar or tags, not microchipped, but I miss it dearly, very well loved! If found please return it to me, Kitty, at Little patch of Weeds Farm. If you are not in a position to catch it, but have seen it please forward the information so I can come try to locate it myself. Thanks.
8. Did you have to jab your favorite goat with another injection that stings, and then milk her out to keep her udder from becoming over full, only to make her upset, and yourself upset and, and, and, and now you are more upset about upsetting her than she is right now?
YES= Solution: Let it go, she is over it already. She is well fed and asleep.
9. Did you disbud the 2 little baby goats and get really distressed because the littlest one, your favorite, seemed to take it harder than usual so now you are sad?
YES= Solution: Let it go, his tummy is full, and he is asleep. Just pray he doesn't get the whole bleeding vessel thing the other kids had going on. Pray and pray some more.
10. Did you decide that after such a hard day, you were going to treat yourself to tacos
, only to end up burning your mouth because you tried to hold the fork in your lips for just a second, so you didn't have to set it down.... the same fork you just flipped the taco shell over in the HOT OIL!?!?!?YES= Solution: Scream, make up some new bad words no one has ever heard of and suck on frozen strawberries for half an hour trying to slow the burn, while you finish cooking.
11. Did you decide to make a nice drink to make up for all of the above, only to have the foil refuse to peel off the champagne bottle????
YES= Solution: Use every last ounce of the patience you have left, realizing that today is only about 2 hours from being over and peel ity bity baby pieces off the top until you finally get it off and get your drink.
If any or all of the above questions were answered in the affirmative, you have definitely had a bad day! No if's, ands or buts about it. Tomorrow is another day... actually it starts in about half an hour... hopefully it will be better than today was, but I think, based on todays experiences, we should just skip Rudy in the morning and have our weigh in with Francois... after all, he is always a gentleman and he is too polite to mention the tacos or the Bellinis we used to make up for the rest of this no good, very bad, day.
Welcome to my life...… come inside if you dare..... (scary laughing sounds here....)
They are stinkin adorable of course, all ears and legs, beautiful colors, and snuggly!!! The derpy one, with the tongue that sticks out, climbed in my lap today and was smoochin me, snuggling his little face on me!!! And the other one, is just so little and precious... and a little bit slow to get going on the bottle, every feeding. He needs a little encouragement. But you call them, and they come running, they follow me into the house.... I am so in trouble.
