Finnie- Finally A Journal

[SageHill]

This is going here because I had to figure out where I wanted to share it. Since I’ve posted African violet stuff before, this made sense. @farmerjan and @SageHill maybe you two better not look. I probably shouldn’t look either since we are supposed to be reining in our spending for the rest of the year. But gee, it’s a 3 month subscription and it looks like you get 3 plants per month, so 9 plants in all, for slightly over $100. Which includes shipping? I’m going to have to revisit this. Or put it on my Christmas list.

Violet Of The Month Club

selectivegardener.com

you know - we are great enablers!!
(though the broken links for the first two pics on the website seems not quite right)

 

[Baymule]

I can see how that would make you tremble with excitement. It’s only a hundred bucks. That big lie, money can’t buy happiness—-oh YES IT CAN!

 

[Finnie]

I have a dilemma, and I’m going to opine about it here, in my journal, and use it as a kind of sounding board. You guys are always supportive of those of us with problems, so BYH is where I naturally turn to. (I have already talked with my family. They are supportive too, but I have to make the decision myself.)

I have a sweet tiny dachshund (Liesl) who turned 15 years old in October. Around her birthday the vet gave me prescriptions for her for some meds to alleviate some issues she has, and basically said that from then on it was just going to be about quality of life. Meaning the end is coming, but who knows how long that will be.

That had me concerned about timing because we had plane tickets to go see family in Colorado for Christmas this year. I discussed it with the boarding kennel lady when I made that booking. She said not to worry. Chances are it won’t happen while she’s there and Liesl has always done really well at the kennel, even though we’ve been worried about her age for some few years now. (The boarding kennel lady loves Liesl. She lets my 3 dogs have their own private room instead of regular pens.) She told me that if Liesl did take a turn for the worse she would call me and we could make that decision as needed. Their vet could put her down if it came to that, and I should just go ahead with my plans.

So for the last couple of months Liesl has been mostly fine. Her issue from the vet visit is that her only two remaining (upper) teeth are infected. To heal, they need to come out. But because of her age and the condition of her heart (a murmur), surgery to remove the teeth is not an option. So the vet recommended “pumping” her on antibiotics. Two weeks on, two weeks off, and so on, basically for the rest of her life. The other two rx’s are for pain, if I feel she needs it, and an anti-nausea medication if her appetite needed boosting.

Well she has been eating normally and not seeming in pain, so we only did the antibiotics. Six weeks so far, and despite several old-age problems, she has been her usual spunky but slow self. When she’s awake. She naps the majority of the time.

So last Wednesday she ended her second round of antibiotics. Friday and Saturday she went off her feed. I started the anti nausea and pain meds on Sunday. I also gave her some cream-of-wheat cereal, which she loved. She is not off her feed any more, but she does have trouble getting food into her mouth what with no lower teeth. The tongue just doesn’t seem capable of licking up anything that is stuck to the bowl or the floor. I also got her some canned food and she is loving that! It’s worth it to her to work extra hard to scoop up as much as she can!

On Monday I noticed she was having green snots, so I decided to restart the antibiotics. At that point she was quite sick and I began to think I would have to put her down instead of taking her to the boarding kennel on Friday. (This coming Friday, the 20th) This had me quite upset because I wanted to give the antibiotics a day or two to work. And I would have to decide whether she was going to get better, and whether it would be better enough to still go to the kennel. I was very upset at the thought that I might have to put her down before Friday simply because I had a schedule I could not alter. What if the antibiotics worked and she got better, but was still in no condition to make the kennel lady deal with her? Is it fair to the kennel lady? Is it fair to Liesl? I’ll tell you who it’s not fair to. Me! Why does it have to be now? I have been in a quandary all week.

If it’s time for her to go, I’m fine with that. But if I wasn’t leaving I would be able to watch her and make the decision when it becomes obvious that it’s needed. I wouldn’t just say “Well Liesl, I’m giving you antibiotics and you have two days or else.” It seems so false to make this decision because of a trip. I told my husband at dinner tonight that she loves this new canned food and it just doesn’t sit right with me to put a dog to sleep that still has an appetite and still wants to eat. And he said, “Well then take her to the boarding kennel,”

I had a lot of angst about putting her to sleep, and I had a lot of angst about handing a dying dog off to the boarding kennel lady. But after he said that, I felt much calmer about the boarding kennel option. I don’t know how much notice my vet needs to schedule a euthanasia appointment. But I guess I will see what tomorrow morning brings.

 

[SageHill]

Totally understand. TOTALLY.
There is no right or wrong answer. You nailed it when you said it's not fair to you.
It's about quality of life - and it sounds like she still has the light on behind her eyes as I say. The good news is she likes the kennel and the gal there. That is HUGE. The lady at the kennel is prepared to call you if she takes a turn for the worst. And prepared by also CALLING you and working from that. HUGE. You're looking at this as if she is going to die while you are gone. It could happen - but she could also be alive and happy when you get home. No crystal ball.
In the summer I had to make a hard decision - the day before we were to fly to CO for my niece's wedding Obi (age 9) was in pain and 3 legged. ER vet for the day. He had a septic elbow. BAD NEWS. Go, don't go, go, don't go.
OH I wanted to go. We had a ranch sitter I was comfortable with who probably could've handled it (I'm sure she could have) but it would have been her first time watching the ranch. I didn't know how Obi would be - things were still up in the air as to what the bacteria was, etc. Hard decision - I stayed home. Obi was on tons of antibiotics and anti-inflammatories and pain meds. Had my ranch sitter have watched everything for us before I may have made a different decision. Well heck if DS wasn't also going to the wedding I would've been ok with him watching and I would have gone -- point of all this is you already have the kennel that is a known and good to go with taking care of her.

 

[Finnie]

Thank you @SageHill That helps.

 

[farmerjan]

If your kennel lady is okay with it, and the antibiotics seem to help her even a little, go..... She could have a good upturn, you can enjoy this trip, and come home to have some more time with her. If the kennel lady is okay with it, and then she goes downhill, you make a decision on the phone as already agreed...
You can't control the timing, and if she still "wants to be here", she is eating the food good, and the antibiotics give her a little more time, you will come back to a little more time with your sweet girl.

 

[Finnie]

If your kennel lady is okay with it, and the antibiotics seem to help her even a little, go..... She could have a good upturn, you can enjoy this trip, and come home to have some more time with her. If the kennel lady is okay with it, and then she goes downhill, you make a decision on the phone as already agreed...
You can't control the timing, and if she still "wants to be here", she is eating the food good, and the antibiotics give her a little more time, you will come back to a little more time with your sweet girl.

Thank you. That gives me encouragement that if Liesl is a little bit improved, I’m not just being selfish to want to give her more time. I know I will have to put her down eventually . Probably soon. It’s never been my intention to prolong any suffering. I think I will see how breakfast goes in the morning and try to determine if there is improvement.

I tried to sleep last night but after an hour or so I just got up. I think I’m tired enough now I could probably sleep a few hours until it’s feeding time.

 

[Baymule]

There is no easy answer to this. She may continue on or she may take a nose dive. It sounds to me like the kennel lady is a loving person and will give Liesl the best of care, even end of life loving care if that becomes necessary. Going on your trip doesn’t make you a hard hearted person. It’s evident that you love this dog that is family. Tell her you love her and wait for you to come back home.

 

[Finnie]

After breakfast report:

(This is copied and pasted from my group text with my kids this morning.)

Liesl is somewhat better today. Her eyes are brighter and no longer sunken in. She barked to get out of her crate (instead of sleeping in) and she happily ate a decent sized breakfast.*

Therefore, I am going to take my chances having her at the boarding kennel this week. Then when I come back I will assess how she is and not be forced to put her to sleep until it's the actual right time.

*For her, that is. She’s never been much of a morning eater.

 

[murphysranch]

My bestest ever cattle dog, Titan, was 15.5 years old. He went senile - stared at walls, tried to go outside thru a kitchen cupboard, still ate somewhat, but he and I were miserable. He loved me the best and vise versa and when he looked at me in that last week, the love light dimmed.

I took him into the vet for a quality of life appt. After much evaluation and discussion, I sent him over the Rainbow Bridge. I was quiet, forgot to pay the bill on the way out, then screamed my head off in the car.

I understand and support your decision to go tomorrow. If Liesl is still with you when you return, then you can lavish even more love on her while your heart decides what's best for her and you.