Promise Acre: Our Journey

[Latestarter]

The whole center of the country is feeling all this water... Glad you got your dinner!

 

[promiseacres]

Well everyone seems healthy.
water has peaked and is going down. Am glad for a few dry days. Many people near the river have homes under water...
My Mom is getting serious about house/farm shopping again. I finally got ahold of a home owner we tried last fall. I got permission to drive up the lane to see the water situation. Which was good. It's a possibility for her....maybe for us too?? 25 acres....(built into a hill with a basement!!! ) is on a hwy though but back a decent lane... anyways still hoping to see my "dream" property too... guess we'll see.

 

[promiseacres]

Can't believe I am considering this but one of my Mom's concerns to moving by us is that we will move further away.... so we (yes i talked to DH) are considering talking to her about somehow buying a property that's big enough for all of us... something that can have an apt or house for her separate from us.... not sure how it would work out legally or otherwise... if she can get her place sold she will have a good amount and can outright buy a 15+ acre property (need closer for all if us. If it needs fencing or barns we could potentially help once we sold our current 4 acres.... or is it just plain crazyness? ???

 

[Wehner Homestead]

This could go either way...do some serious soul-searching and praying. I’ll pray for clarity, wisdom, and guidance for you.

 

[Latestarter]

Many folks do this for an aging parent or parents. It's great if you all get along and can afford it. Of course in doing it, you're pretty much taking full responsibility for her care until she passes. But at the same time will make it much easier for you if that was going to be the case anyway. You'll need to check with a lawyer, but if your mom forms a trust and buys the property (and everything else as far as assets are concerned) in the name of the trust, it avoids probate and court battles as the trust dictates everything when she passes. It will also help avoid some taxation I believe. Again, I'm not a closet thief... ummm I mean lawyer... Actually, it's not lawyers in general that I dislike, it's those that become government and corrupt the judicial system.

 

[CntryBoy777]

Well, ya have to think about the future situation and as age gains on us and health issues arise, nobody wishes to be lonely or face trying to live with lesser physical faculties and trying to struggle to get thru a day's work. I witnessed it with my Mom and Dad. It gave them comfort to have me here in case something happened and they were less active. There were times I had to bite my tongue and be treated like a 5yr old, but looking back I wouldn't trade those times for anything now....because I did all that I could for them and they were able to live their lives in an environment they knew and were comfortable with. It may have some drawbacks, but may be she would like to recoup some mother/daughter time that she misses and wants to experience again....not to mention the time with the grandkids....

 

[Bruce]

Can't believe I am considering this but one of my Mom's concerns to moving by us is that we will move further away.... so we (yes i talked to DH) are considering talking to her about somehow buying a property that's big enough for all of us... something that can have an apt or house for her separate from us.... not sure how it would work out legally or otherwise... if she can get her place sold she will have a good amount and can outright buy a 15+ acre property (need closer for all if us. If it needs fencing or barns we could potentially help once we sold our current 4 acres.... or is it just plain crazyness? ???

Oh yeah, you are totally crazy.

Oh, wait, was I supposed to read the post first?

ASSUMING you, DH and mom get along well, I think it is a fine idea. As @CntryBoy777 said, you can be nearby if she needs something in the future. The people that gave us the alpacas had an in-law apartment added to the side of their garage. There was no access from the apt to the house other than going through the garage so it was almost like a separate house. And if they wanted to go somewhere for a weekend, Mom was there to feed their dogs, no travel necessary.

You would definitely have to work out the "work assignments" ahead of time. For example Mom needs to know you would not be expecting her to be an on-call baby sitter simply because she is really close. And do you eat as a family or she's at her place and your family is at yours? Can Mom help with the animals when she wants to, would she maybe want to be in charge of some of them and she makes the decisions?

Plenty of discussion needed ahead of time but I give it a tentative .

 

[promiseacres]

Saw 2 properties today with Mom. One has 17 acres, large house, pole barn, probably 60% wooded. Very nice location.
The other has 25 acres, smallish but nice house, 40% wooded, smal, barn, 2 pastures. Location isn't too bad, on the highway but set back in the woods. Both are the same price... still haven't really decided... considering telling Mom to make another offer on the one she did last fall... of course nothing firm on selling her place.

 

[promiseacres]

Hoping to take DH to see the properties this afternoon. He is on board.... praying we can figure this out. Oh and 2 rabbits are showing signs of having litters, due in 2 days.

 

[Pastor Dave]

Not an expert on Trusts either, but have one as do my folks. Mom's has me listed after her on theirs. There is a will too, but it just falls in with the Trust. It avoids probate, but doesn't shelter from taxes. I am not sure if a Quick Deed change avoids taxes, but not even a novice, so... Buying a big enough property that will hold your Mom and y'all will at least ease her mind on y'all moving from her. It would help her to know you will be there as she ages too.