I think I am on the peak of a whiner hill... ya know.... seeing the world at glass half empty and not being glad of the blessings that I know I have...
I do currently have a mountain of things piled up in that hill that are all rubbing me raw....
But the new one... I thought I would share... since I am not about to whine about it out loud to the "real life" folks in my life... I thought I would allow myself a bit of an out loud whine to the 2 dimensional folks in my life....
On top of all the rest of it... my eyes are messed up.... or, going bad, or what have you....
I went in to the doctor yesterday because of a spot in my vision..... I didn't think it was a detached retina, but I was thinking maybe it was bad.... so I went in..
It is bad... my retinas are thinning, dramatically. In my right eye some of the retina is already "lost" (thickened and scarred up) the "spot" in that right eye is a volcano... blood pushing up against the retina, making it look like a volcano wanting to erupt... and... retinas do not work well when in that position. It is of course, located in the smack dab middle of the field of vision in my right eye... which is why I noticed it.
I said to the doc examining me... eh, whatever, so I lose one eye, I only need one, just tell me if the left looks good. Answer was, not really.
So... I have a referral to a retina specialist in Anchorage, don't yet have an appointment....
This all does explain why it has been so much harder to see things... and my eyes get tired much faster... I spend a bunch of time now, just thinking with my eyes closed.
It might all get stabilized though.. at the retina clinic... I did not get a "you will be full on blind" diagnosis. So, it isn't as bad as I am making it sound... I just... am stuck on that pile of whines.