Question for horse people

[momofonly]

I don't have a horse, but my 7 y.o. daughter has been taking pony riding lessons for several months, and loves it. They started her on a miniature horse, and have moved up to a bigger pony.

Being around a lot of horse people, I have to ask, are you ever scared? Everyone who works with horses seems so fearless. I have always had pets, but ones small enough for me to pick up- birds, rabbits, guinea pigs, cats, small dogs, etc. I know if I make a mistake with my cat, for example, the worst I will get is a scratch or bite. But it seems a mistake with a horse or pony could be deadly, or result in a severe injury.

I went on my first trail ride a few months ago. I liked it, but what kept going through my mind was, "I'm at the mercy of this animal. If this horse decides to throw me, I'm in trouble." I guess I'm used to being in control of my animals.

My daughter is not like me (which is probably a good thing) and shows no fear of the horses and ponies.

I guess my question is, how did you get to that point of being fearless? I like to feed them carrots and pat them on the head, but I would never want to get too close to the back of one. All I can think about is being kicked in the head. Maybe I'm being too dramatic- does a kick necessarily send you to the hospital?

I hope this doesn't sound too silly, I'm just trying to make some sense of these thoughts. :/

 

[patandchickens]

I am pretty sure that all horse people over the age of 30 or so have been scared at some point, and in fact probably pretty nearly everyone over the age of 15 as well (There are some kids who genuinely seem not to have a shred of fear. The word for this is "inexperience" LOL)

But, either you get over it, learn to manage it, decide to avoid things that scare you, or you get out of horses. So no, you will not see many people in the horse world who are *overall* scared of horses.

A lot of what you describe thinking is taken care of by mileage/experience/education. You learn how to recognize problem situations and fix or avoid them; you learn what is realistically a risk and what's not; you learn to read horses well enough that you can tell what's going on between their ears and whether it should concern you.

Of course a kick does not necessarily send you to the hospital, and darn few people get kicked in the head (although obviously in the rare case where that *does* happen, it can be a very bad thing, also being kicked hard in the chest or thigh). I've gotten kicked a good number of times (I am 45, started riding at 9, have spent large quantities of time both as an amateur and professionally working with horses) but never gotten more than a bruise and a story out of it. Chiefly I attribute this to walking either very, very close past hte back of a horse or out of its kicking range, and paying attention to whether the horse knows I'm there and is in a good mood, and not pushing my luck with strange or questionable horses. I'm sure there's an element of luck, too.

But I mean, think of all the things that could go wrong driving a car or walking down the sidewalk. I don't think accidents are any less under your control with horses, presuming you are in an environment appropriate to your experience level.

The only time I've gone to the hospital from a horse injury was at an intercollegiate horse show where they don't let you warm the horse up first, which IMO is the main reason why the perfectly nice little horse I was riding that day failed to put his landing gear down on the far side of a jump and rolled completely over me as he fell. I got a couple cracked vertebrae that have been of pretty minor lifetime significance, and a *hugely* sprained leg, and that's all.

If you like horses, it is certainly possible to take lessons and learn more about horse behavior and handling and work on getting over the irrational/exaggerated parts of your fears.

OTOH not everyone has to be a horseman, and if you just don't WANT to do more than feed them carrots, there's nothing wrong with that either (I would still recommend learning about safety and horse behavior, since feeding the wrong horse a carrot in the wrong way probably gets more people hurt than getting kicked does )

(e.t.a. -- I am pickier about what horses I will ride now that I am middle-aged and getting arthritic and no longer bounce so well; but the only thing with horses that you absolutely will never see me doing because it scares me silly is the thought of driving a racing sulky behind a Standardbred at full speed. It wigs me out just to watch it from the rail, in fact )

Good luck, have fun,

Pat

 

[chubbydog811]

The fear is normal if you are just starting out. I have been riding for 13 years, and have owned them 12 out of the 13. You would be best taking lessons, or asking the barn owner to teach you more on the ground so that you have a better understanding of the horses - behavior, why they do things, why they don't ect.

As to how long, depends on the person. I was fearless from the start, where others are timid for a while. Just depends how long it takes you to learn about the animal (and find a safe one when you are ready, to reinforce not needing to be scared of them).

A kick can most definitely send you to the hospital. As well as being tossed, or bitten, or plowed over, or...instert possible bad thing here....

Not trying to scare you by saying that, just showing you the actuality of it. Horses can be dangerous, not saying that all are, but they have potential...Even so much as the horse accidentally taking a wrong step and hurting you, not their fault, but it could hurt you...Anything is possible. You just have to learn from a good teacher how to ride and handle a horse, as well as teach you how to react/respond to different situations.

Hope this answered some of your question in my rambling

 

[sterlng&sierra]

If any horse person tells you that they are never afraid, they are full of you-know-what.

You are right, horses are much larger than a human, and much stronger. But they are also prey animals that are very sensitive to the emotions of the animals around it, and they feed off the emotions of their handlers. This is why most horse people seem fearles. What I have learned is, even in a bad situation, the only emotion has to be calm confidence. If you are afraid, some horses might look around and behave spooky, because they think there is something to be afraid of. If you are not confident, some horses will refuse to do a certain task, such as jumping, because if their rider is not confident, why shoud they follow his/her orders? Don't get me wrong, there are babysitter types who will take care of the frightened rider, but most horses look to their riders and handlers for confidence and guidance.

And horses are dangerous. People have been killed, I will not sugar coat it or lie to you. If a horse kicks you in the right spot with enough force, you could die, be left with serious injury, or you culd walk away with nothing more than a bruise. You might also get sent to the hospital by slipping on the ice. The only way you can help prevent the inevitable injuries all horse people recieve is knowing basic safety. Don't walk up to a horse from behind, use proper riding gear, get a new helmet after each fall, or every five years.

There will come a time when your daughter will get scared. She might fall, get kicked, or some other accident. This is where the babysitter horses I mentioned above come in. These animals are worth their weight in gold, and if she gets over that first ride, it usually only gets better.

I have had one serious fall, and it took months before I could do more than a slow trot. My pony helped a lot, and the schoolmasters at my trainer's barn helped, too. It set me back, but I got over it. But I think what really helped me was the horse I smoved on to from my pony. He was different in almost every way: he was nervous, withdrawn, and not confident at all. That was when I learned that I had to be calm and confident for the horse, or we would both end up scared and fidgety, frustrated and upset. That's how I did it, but I think it is different for each person.

 

[momofonly]

Thanks for all of the great replies!

My daughter actually did get kicked by a pony a few weeks ago, but it was due to a mistake that could have been avoided. They have an old, retired pony that walks freely around the property. We were waiting for her riding teacher, and patting this pony on the head when my daughter decided to get behind it before I could stop her. I told her not to, but she did before I could stop her, and got kicked and fell down. Thankfully, she wasn't hurt, but as you can imagine, it scared the heck out of me. Her riding teacher then came, but didn't see what happened. When I told her, she was very cavalier about it, which was probably good. She calmly explained how my daughter could avoid getting kicked in the future. Honestly, I was still shaken for a few days afterwards, but my daughter forgot all about it. I made her promise, from now on, to not get close to that one who kicked her, though.

So, instead of my daughter becoming afraid, I think I have become more fearful instead. I've been keeping it to myself, though, because I don't want her to get afraid and stop riding since she loves it so much.

 

[Bunnylady]

Anyone with even the slightest understanding of physics and a grain of sense can see that there is a genuine danger when something as small as a person gets close to something as big as a horse. I agree with Pat, anyone that is completely fearless probably hasn't been around long enough to appreciate the risks. But if courage is looking danger in the face and still moving forward, perhaps what you are seeing is courage rather than fearlessness. You know the danger is there, but choose not to focus on it. Understanding how the animal works helps a lot.

Certainly, a horse can hurt you, but most of them have no real desire to do so. Even the ones that are a bit grumpy about working are only acting out in protest, they aren't really trying to damage anyone. As long as reasonable precautions are taken, you can be reasonably safe.

I went on my first trail ride a few months ago. I liked it, but what kept going through my mind was, "I'm at the mercy of this animal. If this horse decides to throw me, I'm in trouble." I guess I'm used to being in control of my animals.

Some things, ya gotta take on trust. You were trusting the horse to behave itself, trusting that the people that trained and handled the horse did their jobs properly. You were trusting that the tack was properly adjusted and in good repair. The trust went both ways; the horse was trusting that you weren't going to do anything goofy and put it at risk, too. We are in charge because they let us be; it is up to us to behave as if we are worthy of their confidence in us as leader. Most of the time, if we are reasonable, so are they, and everybody stays safe.

 

[()relics]

Scared=respect...You respect a horse or any large animal with the understanding that they can hurt you, on purpose or by accident. You become comfortable around a horse as you become familiar with how and why he does what he does....then you can begin to be less scared. Anyone who tells you they were never scared by a horse IS LYING or stupid...I have been around horses all my life and know what I can get away with, most of the time. Still I am scared, read respectful, of a new horse or a horse introduced to new things. The difference is knowing what is scared and what is terrified...If you are terrified the horse will read that and may very well Make You Pay...But if you are scared but yet confident, the horse will also see that and lean on you for some direction....Here-in lies the problem...trainers forget to teach their students to be scared/respectful. The student sees the trainer "fearlessly" pushing the horses buttons, not realizing that the trainer knows exactly what is going to happen and is confident enough in himself that he will react in the "proper" fashion. Enter the student...he is also going to "test" the horse BUT without the proper "worst case scenario" plan...I sometimes yell at my kids for doing things that I do...I know what My next move will be and usually the horses as well, but they fall into the Student group that Do as They See, without thinking....Read Not Scared

 

[adoptedbyachicken]

I agree that horses can hurt you, but know in almost all the wrecks I have seen that miscommunication or lack of respect for each other (both horse of human and human of horse) is the cause. Learn their ways, study the communication between horses and the training of the horses your working or dealing with and your safety is much higher. You can get seriously hurt by a horse it's true, but you can by your car too and you have become comfortable that with risk, or most have. Most of us learn by the few bumps along the way, or a scare here and there, a dented bumper and we wise up, are more respectful of icy roads, or whatever. The learning curve with horses is similar.

NO horse or pony should kick just because someone went behind it, or especially while someone is behind it! I really dislike that a place that has kids coming around to learn would have such a pony loose in a place where your daughter could have that interaction. I would have that pony off in the back 40 pasture till I had that worked out had it been mine. With proper leadership and respect work done they can all overcome that. So many ponies are given a bad name or even 'allowed' that type of behavior because they are ponies. Sorry, I don't get that. I'm really glad your daughter was not hurt and that she has moved on. Yes avoid that pony and be sure of the others as well since if they have one like that they may have others.

 

[mully]

Never let them see you sweat !!

 

[momofonly]

So many ponies are given a bad name or even 'allowed' that type of behavior because they are ponies.

Do ponies have a reputation for being more tempermental than horses?

Thanks to everyone for the words of wisdom. I am planning on doing another trail ride sometime, but this time I'll wear a helmet. (Last time I completely forgot about using a helmet, but no one else was wearing one either.) The trail ride isn't where my daughter rides, by the way- they only do trail rides, no lessons, for adults and older children.