My BJ, My Husband has Died

Marie2020

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:hugs

Anyone worth knowing is never all right in the head.

Us crazy folks are the best folks. ;)

At least you talk to ashes... I talk to myself, while at the grocery store.
I sung too myself while shopping last week and I am not American ;)

But, I am a friend of Dana's so I'm not so crazy after all ,I've got good taste in friends
 

Marie2020

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There is something very comforting knowing the essence of your loved one is near. I brought my Dad's ashes home with me when I was worried my Mom might misplace him as she began to suffer from dementia. He was on my dresser with a little vase of flowers or memorial memento near him. When I needed comfort, I would pick up the box and hold it for a bit. It was quite heavy and reminded me that all my Dad ever was to me was still there and uplifting me. 14 years later, when Mom died, I placed his ashes in her casket over her heart, as they wished. The service celebrated them both and I felt privileged to have been the caretaker of his earthly remains until he went to join her - two soul mates together again.

My sincerest condolences to you, Bay. I have followed your adventures in your "Paradise" and know the joy both you and BJ were experiencing. His loss is a true tragedy but you must be an exceptionally wonderful person to have so many friends and acquaintances already coming forward offering meaningful help and support in your time of need. In spite of this unexpected turn of events, you will survive and flourish again.
I don't think we have chatted but after reading what you wrote I would dearly love too know you :)
 

Marie2020

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Yes, we did! Spontaneous, laughter, crazy fun!


Thank you! My daughter was 9 years old then and wanted me to have a gorgeous dress, long train and lots of lace. She told me to expect to spend $1,000. :lol: She gave me a detailed description of this dress I was supposed to go buy. I be-bopped into a resale shop, told them I needed a wedding dress and gave them my daughter's description. Lady said she had one, what size was I? I replied, SKINNY. She brought out the dress, I tried it on, perfect fit for $125. :gig:lol:
You would look great in anything
 

Marie2020

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I called my sister crying yesterday morning. Having a bad day. We talked for awhile and I felt better. She suggested that I take BJ's clothing to a men's shelter, that it will be cold soon and they will need socks, coats, everything. So I started cleaning out the closet. BJ's closet is 4'x10'. I built 2 towers, 18" deep x 7' tall. One is 3' wide, the other is 2' wide and I put shelves in it. 2 pole bars for hanging clothes go between the towers. I put baskets on some of the shelves for small items like socks and underwear. I put a bookcase in the closet for his shoes. He was so proud of his closet, and it was full. The man liked clothing and looking good.

So far I have 8 trash bags full and I'm not done yet. I still have to bag up coats and suits. I'm keeping his shirts to make quilts for the granddaughters. A woman who I've known all of her 42 years looked at him as her dad because her father was an alcoholic train wreck and died when she was in her 20's. She even lived with us for about a year one time. I will make her a memory pillow and I'm giving her one of his big T-shirts. I'm keeping one of his army coats, I have a picture of him wearing it that I love. Keeping a few of his T-shirts too so I can wear them around the house or sleep in them. I feel much better knowing that his things will go to those in need. I can't haul all that around with me, so best to face reality now and do something positive with them. Tearful? Yes. Hard? Yes. But it must be done.
I'm so very proud of you. What beautiful thing to do :hugs
 

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